“Life’s too short to work with arseholes, and I’ve been lucky enough not to have to.”

(Source: the-ashen)

rabioheab:

mom, dad, these are my newborn twins. their names are mom and dad. i named them after you. what do you mean ‘mom’ and ‘dad’ aren’t your real names? what the hell? i already named these kids thanks for telling me now

(Source: st0ned-1mmaculatee)

lameborghini:

fuck u guys and ur 1k selfies

indiavenne:

x

palmfox:

xlub:

perf omg

What beautiful chocolate

(Source: glamour-inspiration)

chickensandwich:

snorlaxatives:

i wonder what birds talk about when they sit on telephone wires together

“hey denise, shit on this woman when she walks by lmao”